Blackout

I am currently feeling the grief of loosing the mother I knew and love to Alzheimer’s Disease. This is bringing up all kinds of issues and changes in me - how I view and wish to live my life and how I behave in my relationships. I needed to project my frustration, instead of my pain, as I found myself questioning the use of my time.  I begrudge the daily routines of household chores which need to get done, as they steal my time.  Maybe this is part of my getting older - a sense of urgency and finding a sense of meaning in my actions.

Time and repetition is something which constantly preys on my mind, so I used multiple images in one frame, to project a sense of time, motion and continuity.

Each series within a frame, was faded out gradually, to form part of a new series,  enhancing the notion of monotony, and how I shut myself down, giving way to a lack of motivation and enthusiasm. 

The stories I feel compelled to narrate in pictures are autobiographical - to do with feelings and issues I am currently experiencing, trying to understand and deal with them. The camera is a tool which allows me freedom of self-expression and helps me to find my voice. My fear is accepting my life as it is, without challenging and questioning my actions, purely out of habit.